Gods and Monsters
by Delinquent Dog
Summary: Detailing Lena's life from when she moved to Gotham and her meeting with Harley and the Joker until her joining of the Suicide Squad, this is a prequel to 'I Promise, I'll Be Good' you could however read this first and that second or vice versa, I hope you all enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

Hello all, this is a prequel to 'I Promise, I'll Be Good' you could however read this first and that second or vice versa, I hope you all enjoy.

Chapter One

Lena had been 'living' well more like surviving in Gotham for the last 4 months, it had been a warm summer when she arrived and it was now the dead of winter. Being from the south, Lena didn't exactly have cold weather clothes on hand with her, she layered several sweaters whenever she went out. But the chill of the winter always seemed to freeze her down to the bones, how she hadn't got sick had been nothing sort of a miracle.

Due to only being sixteen there were few places willing to hire her and god knows she had been trying to get a job but the only places willing to hire where seedy clubs or brothels. There were few things Lena had been good at but singing had been one of them, despite her father often telling her 'That's a waste of time, where's singing going to get you?"

So with her bright idea Lena dressed herself in her Sunday best plus a few extra sweaters and made her way to the downtown area. Lena sang songs primarily from the 50's and 60's mostly, new music had never been her style perhaps it was because her parents had been older than most when she was born. People stopped to listen, some even left a dollar or two in the hat she had placed on the floor. She thanked everyone of them, in the first few days she had somehow made enough money to rent a tiny room.

Whereas before she had been staying in a woman's shelter, having lied about being abused but it was either lie or starve. The room wasn't huge but it held a bed and a microwave and that was enough. After a month or so of singing on the same street corner she began to make good money well maybe not good but enough to survive on. The first thing she splashed out on was a warm winter coat and a good hot chocolate.

Lena had gained a few fans, ones who came to see her every week and she recognised them all despite Gotham being a busy city. Being from a small southern town made her appreciate the anonymity of the big city but sometimes she longed for the familiarity. For people she knew and that knew her, people who would stop her and ask her about certain events in her life.

It had been six months now since Lena had started singing on the street and it had been two weeks since a man in a black suit had been coming to see her sing every day. Lena wondered who he was of course she could have just delved into his mind but she hated doing that although sometimes she couldn't always control it.

The voices in her head however seemed to grow louder each day, not always being able to silence them. Her mind had been a scary place for a long time although she tried not to dwell on it.

The darkness of the night was starting to draw in and that was when Lena would call it a day. She made her way to her favourite cafe ordering a lemon and honey tea, selecting a table in the bag she sipped at the tea. Wondering whether she should treat herself to the last blueberry muffin that sat on the counter.

"Go on, we deserve it we did good today." The more reasonable of the voices soothed away her indecision. Smiling to herself Lena decided that it would be okay to splurge on the small muffin. She made her way up to the counter, but someone had beat her too it, she sighed. It had been the man in the suit the once who had been watching her.

"Here... you can take it." The tall stranger held out the paper bag that contained the muffin.

"No it's okay, you've already paid, but can I get another lemon and honey to go please?" Lena quickly took her drink from the barista leaving the correct amount of money on the counter before she made for a quick exit.

"Wait...my boss he wants you to drop by his club, he wants a singer." The tall stranger called out to Lena as she made her getaway.

The stranger managed to catch her up, tapping her on the shoulder, Lena whipped round gun in hand.

"That's a big gun for a little girl, look I don't want no trouble." The stranger held his hands up in surrender.

"I'm not a little girl." Lena's voice wavered slightly as she spoke.

"Sure, I'm Johnny by the way, look my boss's lady likes the way you sing wants you to come down to the club." Johnny attempted to reason with Lena, watching as her expression softened.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean too; you know wave a gun in your face." She was apologetic but you could never be too careful in Gotham.

"It's fine, look it's a Monday night the club will be quite, I'll escort you there myself, it ain't too far." Johnny now tried to thaw the icy atmosphere.

"I'm a little tired, tomorrow I'm taking the day off, look here's my address come by and I'll go see your boss." Having already stowed the gun away in her coat, she took out a pen pulling his hand toward her she scrubbed her address down. Johnny stood in somewhat disbelief watching as Lena turned and walked off.

The walk to her apartment hadn't taken as long as usual which Lena was grateful for because the temperature had seemingly dropped a few degrees by the time she reached her door. Lena shed her many layers before pulling a blanket around her shoulders and heading towards the fridge.

"Tomato or chicken?" She whispered softly to herself, the decision was quick last night was chicken so tonight it would be tomato.

The soup was heating through in the microwave, Lena flicked through the newspaper not particularly interested but it was enough for her brain to remain stimulated enough so that she would fall asleep in her dinner. The microwave let out an annoying high pitched repeated beep to signal that it was done. Lena ate her soup by her window observing the busy street below.

It was well past midnight before Lena turned in for the night the sounds of sirens lulled her too sleep, her sleep was fitful as always. She often woke early stretching her arms as high as she could feel the muscles in her sides strain. The alarm clock read 5:24, she sighed laying back down in bed attempting to fall back to sleep. The attempt must have worked because it was 8:32 the next time Lena glanced over at the clock, she pulled herself out of bed and stumbled towards the bathroom. She pulled off the oversized T-shirt she often wore to sleep in and dropped it into the waiting hamper along with her undergarments.

The steam of the hot water of the shower soon filled the small bathroom, Lena stepped into the scalding stream only to quickly turn the knob to adjust the temperature. The strawberry scent of her shampoo filled her senses as she massaged it into her scalp. The rest of her routine was soon done as she stepped out the shower into her steamy bathroom, wrapping herself in s slightly threadbare towel. Lena dried her hair quickly before pulling it into a messy bun as she left the bathroom.

Lena glanced around her small studio apartment letting it a loud sigh as she did. It wasn't much but it was home, it was still early, the stranger or Johnny as he had introduced himself to her probably wouldn't appear until well into the evening. Which meant she had the day to do the things she loved. Lena spent ten minutes dressing and making herself look somewhat presentable before pulling on her coat placing her purse on the inside pocket, grabbing her keys as she passed the hook by the door.

She headed straight for her favourite cafe for her daily fix of lemon and honey tea. Lena watched the world pass by for a little while before deciding to move on to her next destination. The Gotham gallery was a ten-minute walk away as Lena wasn't in a hurry she took in the architecture of the vast buildings as she walked by them. Lena had yet to realise a familiar person following her every move or at least the person didn't think she had realised.

Stopping short of the gallery's main entrance turning to look around her, noticing immediately the stranger from the night before.

"He's going to kill us, that's why he's following us."

"Not kill us, but it is a little odd that he's following us, his boss must be someone important."

"Do you think he's going to follow us all day?" The voices in Lena's head spoke quickly and seemingly all at once causing the stabbing pains to begin once more. She rubbed her temples far harder than was necessary but I did the trick and with a 'POP' the voices were gone.

Taking a deep breath Lena walked through the grand entrance nodding to the security guard who recognised her from her weekly visits. The gallery was somewhere that the voices didn't usually appear which made it a pleasant place to be. Lena made straight for the section containing the old masters, it took her breathe away that these were paintings yet they looked just like photographs.

She took a seat in the middle of the gallery glancing around at all the paintings drinking in all their details.

"Why here?" A voice spoke from beside her, Lena turned to see Johnny the now familiar stranger.

"I come here every week, I find it soothing." Not like she was about to tell a near stranger about the voices in her head.

"Right." Came the short sharp reply, just like her father used to when he thought what she said was stupid. Lena could feel the panic rise in her body, because after the short reply would come a fist or the belt.

"I don't. I mean it's stupid...Idontknowwhyicomeherebutforsomereasonsyhevoicesstopandgivemequietsicomehereeveryweekforabreak." Lena spoke stumbling over her words, quickly trying to give explanation so as to avoid the oncoming punishment. Johnny just looked at her, somewhat amused by her outburst.

Flashback

"What have I told you before young lady."

"But daddy I didn't meant too...daddy please I promise I'll do better I promise I'll be good." The young girl shrieked as the belt whipped at her small back.

"Momma, I promise I'll be good." Another slap of the belt followed along with five of six others. The young girl sobbed on the floor as the door to her room was locked.

She cried out for her big brother but he would never come he hadn't been home in four years; no letters no phone calls she was alone now. The abuse started many years ago before that both emotional and physical, her father was the worst, her mother never seemed to know what was going on.

Her mother had been beaten into submission years ago and now it was her turn. The voices had just begun, they tried to soothe her make her feel like she was worth something. But that would never be the case.

Despite all of what happened to the young girl she was still so naive so trusting of people.

End of Flashback

"I ain't going to hurt you ya know." He spoke quietly for some reason he felt the need to soothe her.

"I'm sorry." The apology rolled off Lena's tongue sincerely as always, it was a word she always meant because not meaning it usually meant pain.

"The boss said he wants to see you sooner rather than later; it's his lady's birthday wants you to sing at the party Saturday night." Johnny watched as the anxiety physically left her body as it became less rigid.

"Oh, really? Okay." Lena spoke softly, the anxiety mixed with the flashbacks always took a lot out of her. There was something in Johnny that at that moment wanted to kiss her but he decided that this wasn't the time.

"Cars waiting." Johnny stood and bang making his way out of the large gallery, he wondered if she knew that there was a whole gallery the other side of town dedicated to the old masters. He shook the thought out of his head checking over his shoulder to make sure she was following him.

The car was a black Rolls Royce, it was one of the fanciest cars Lena had even seen and she would be getting to ride in it. Johnny held the passenger side door open for her, she hesitated suddenly conscious that she would dirty the interior in some way.

"Well, get in then." Johnny sensed how uncomfortable she was but he didn't have time to wait for her to get over it. Lena stepped into the car carefully trying to touch as little as possible, she looked around the car. Noting that the inside was just as luxurious as the outside.

A few seconds later Johnny had slipped into the driver's seat seeming completely blasé to her wide eyed expression.

"Just some things about Mr J, he doesn't like shaking hands, keep eye contact to a minimum, speak clearly, do what he says most importantly don't be rude to his lady." Johnny gazed over at Lena who he knew hadn't heard a word she had said, she was too busy concentrating on not touching anything.

Lena had heard the name 'Mr J' being carried on the wind of the streets, he was the man to go to if you ever needed anything or had a problem that needed fixing. The car journey hadn't been long before they had pulled up outside of the 'Grin and Bare it', Lena noted that in small letter beneath it said strip club. Her eyes opened wide, hugging herself as if trying to cover as much as herself in the process.

Johnny stifled a laugh as he watched her reaction, he slipped out of the now parked car before walking round and opening the door for Lena, who climbed carefully out taking a deep breath as she went.

"You heard me right? About what I said in the car...I can't help you if you mess up." Johnny knew he'd feel bad if anywhere were to happen to Lena. She simply nodded as she followed him inside the club, it wasn't what Lena had in mind when she thought of a strip club. Girls danced around poles, Lena watched in amazement as the girls twirled deftly around the poles with what seemed like very little effort.  
"Wait here." Johnny had led them to a set of double doors, knocking loudly before entering the unseen room. Lena watched the clock on the adjacent wall as the minutes ticked by.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?" A young woman appeared out of nowhere, Lena noticed that the ends of her hair was two toned red and blue.  
"Oh…I have a meeting with the boss?" Lena seemed unsure of herself and the woman picked up on it.

"How long ya been waitin'?"  
"Oh not long." Lena glanced at the clock and it had been 23 minutes exactly since Johnny had left her waiting there.  
"Well it's too long, I'm gonna go ruffle some feathers, nice to meet ya." The young woman entered the room, the door closed behind her just as quickly as it had opened.

"He's ready to see you now." Johnny appeared through the door again, as a bone chilling laugh could be heard behind the door.

End of Chapter

Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed the chapter, any feedback would be greatly appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

A bright light sat above a single chair sat in the middle of the otherwise dark room, the light blinding Lena as Johnny motioned for her to sit down.  
"So Johnny, this is your little song bird?" a voice came out of the darkness, lena had yet to see who it was that spoke but she took note that whoever it was made it sound like she belonged to Johnny.  
"Yes sir." Johnny replied with unseen confidence.

"So birdy, would you give us a song?" The voice asked well more like it demanded from her. Lena sat straighter in the chair and began to sing the words came out effortlessly as she closed her eyes imagining musical accompaniment.

 _'In the land of Gods and Monsters_

 _I was an Angel_

 _Living in the garden of evil_

 _Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed_

 _Shining like a fiery beacon'_

 _You got that medicine I need  
Fame, Liquor, Love give it to me slowly  
Put your hands on my waist, do it softly  
Me and God, we don't get along so now I sing_

 _No one's gonna take my soul away  
I'm living like Jim Morrison  
Headed towards a fucked up holiday  
Motel sprees, sprees and I'm singing  
'Fuck yeah give it to me this is heaven, what I truly  
Want'  
It's innocence lost  
Innocence lost'_

Lena pulled herself from her singing in time to see that the man before her had shocking green hair, piercing blue eyes and had skin paler than porcelain. His lips that were painted blood red curled into a smile as he looked at her, his gaze powerful and his smile persuasive. That was how she had met the joker, it was all very civilised but there was something about him that made Lena think of her father, dark, violent and possibly a little insane.

 _Lena must have been around 3 years old when she remembered the first time she met her father. He'd been away with the army and had been away for the three years where she had walked the earth already._

 _"Lena...you get to meet daddy today."_ _Rick spoke softly to the little girl as he braided her hair. That time had come where their father arrived home and he all but ignored the little girl but not for her lack of trying._

 _"Take the kid for ice cream" their father handed Rick money all but pushing them out the door._

 _"Come on Lena we can go get ice cream." The little girl followed her older brother from the house, how terrible it had been for her to have been pushed away by not just one parent but both._

 _"You'll_ do it then Eleanor, sing for us here at the club?" Lena had missed whatever it was that had been said beforehand. She had also missed that he had called her Eleanor which was a name she had very rarely used herself so how he knew was only a mystery. She only nodded in response still dazed from her flashback they'd never gone that far back before and it had caught her off guard.

"Good, I'm glad I'll have Johnny boy pick you up Saturday, it has been a pleasure songbird." The joker laughed, Lena felt the chills right down to her bones it was a sound that was uncomfortable upon the ears and she sure that was the response he wanted.

"Thank you for the opportunity." Lena spoke quietly but clearly.

"Well isn't she a darling?" The slightly inane man looked over to her as another light in the room was turned on, a tall lamp stood near a desk.

"Don't disappoint me, I'm not opposed to pushing kids back into the gutter." Joker replied with a smile on his face, what was a child or near adult to him? When he had already killed so many others before?

Lena nodded again before standing to leave, to say she was shaken was an understatement but the man she had met made her feel both uncomfortable and at ease all at once. Once out of the office Lena let out a deep breath, she had been holding it in for most of the meeting.

Her doe eyes scanned the club itself, a strip club, women walking around scantily clad and some in no clothing at all. The blush rose on her cheeks she was convinced that she was the colour of a tomato by now.

"Oh look at this pretty little thing, J seems to be getting them in younger and younger."

"Some of the other men will eat her up."

"Literally." Three of the said scantily clad women had passed Lena talking amongst themselves choosing to stop.

"I... I'm just a singer." She spoke quickly the women almost missed what she had said.

"Sure girly and I'm the queen of England." One of the women cackled.

"That's how it starts for someone of us you know, we came here to sing and next think you know we take our clothes off for old men." Another spoke, it was obvious to anyone other than Lena what it was they were trying to do, but she was still so young and naïve.

"Knock it off girls, come on Birdy." Johnny appeared from the office placing a hand on Lena's back as he escorted her out of the seedy club and into the waiting car.

Johnny opened the door of the black Rolls Royce, she gave him a small smile as she stepped in settling into the seat as she did. She pulled a hand over her mouth and yawned as Johnny pulled himself into the driver's seat.  
"Don't worry about them…they're harmless." He spoke softly as he looked over at her, Johnny couldn't work out what it was about her but he felt himself being drawn to Lena.  
"How did he…how did he know my name." Lena looked over at him, her vulnerability showing threw as was a little fear.  
"I don't know…Eleanor is a beautiful name, you should use it." He spoke truthfully if Joker heard him talking like that he would have probably shot him for being weak.  
"Thank you." Lena mumbled as she rested her head against the passenger window as she tried to fight her instinct to sleep right there and then.  
"Sleep if you're tired." Johnny spoke more harshly than he had wanted too but Lena hadn't heard as she had already fallen asleep.

It took longer than usual to drive from one side of Gotham, according to the radio there had been a shootout downtown, Johnny laughed it was something that was predictable especially for a Friday evening. He looked over at Lena wondering how exactly he was going to get the young woman out of the car and into her apartment without people thinking he was some sort of criminal…well he was already one of those but for some reason Johnny didn't want Lena to see him that way.

"Lena…Lena wake up." His attempt to rouse her gently didn't seem to work neither did a gentle arm on her shoulder.  
"I'm sorry." Lena mumbled as her long eyelashes fluttered open looking over at him with her bleary doe eyes.  
"It's fine, I'll pick you up tomorrow." Johnny spoke as he looked at anywhere other than at her, leaning over Lena placed a delicate kiss on his rough cheek before stepping out of the car.

Yawning Lena made her way up the steps of her apartment building before keying her security number into the keypad. The door buzzed as Lena struggled to push it open managing to slip inside she ran up the four flights of stairs to her apartment. She pulled the keys from her pocket with ease her lucky rabbit foot turned keyring attempting to unlock her apartment door. Lena pushed the heavy duty door open slipping inside to her place of safety.

Lena glanced over at the green Bakelite phone expecting it too ring but why would it when no one had her number? A loud grumble emanated loudly from her stomach as she groaned dipping into her pocket to retrieve her keys, before pulling open her apartment door again and heading out into the cold. Upon exiting her building Lena noticed a certain black rolls Royce still stood out front, choosing to ignore it and carried on walking.  
"Lena…wait." Johnny shouted out after her immediately regretting his decision, he'd always been told never to get involved with the help.

Lena whipped around to see Johnny striding up behind her, she mentally noted just how good he looked in his suit, shaking the thought away quickly.

"Did you need something?" Lena spoke softly her voice almost lost in the light breeze.

"You shouldn't be walking out here alone at night, there's bad people around." Seriousness laced Johnny's voice as Lena only laughed.

"Well the only stranger that has ever approached me at night is you but thank you for your concern." She began walking again, Johnny smirked he liked to see her cocky side.

 _"He likes us far more than he should."_

 _"We shouldn't want to get involved with him, he's a thug."_

 _"We like him too don't we?"_

 _"We most certainly do not, he just did us a favour that's it nothing more._

 _The constant chatter of the voices died down only a little as she stood in front of her favourite bakery, she pushed herself against the door as it opened with a creak and a ring of a bell._

The old lady sat behind the counter didn't even look up from her erotic novel as Lena made her way over, she briefly looked over the menu overhead.  
"can I get two slices of coffee cake, a black coffee and a tea with lemon and honey." A voice behind her spoke out loudly, she turned to see none other than Johnny Frost.  
"I'd call the police but after meeting your boss, I have a feeling they wouldn't do anything." Lena spoke softly yet her words bit into him like a rabid dog  
"a mouth like that will get you killed." He sighed as he watched her attempt at being tough.  
"Really, well you better start unloading that gun of yours into my pretty little head." Lena found a table out towards the back peeling off her coat, he followed her taking a seat.

"You're not leaving anytime soon are you? Can't a girl celebrate her birthday alone?" Lena sighed heavily.

"It's your birthday?" Johnny seemed surprised, but from what his boss had found out about her, birthdays weren't a celebrated thing, Lena just hummed in response to his question, having grown tired of talking. The two sat in silence until the cake and drinks arrived when they both murmured a quick 'thank you' before digging in.

"Why are you following me?" Lena looked over at him" a glint of seriousness in her doe eyes.  
"Boss told me to keep an eye on you." He responded, it was almost like a pre-programmed comeback and it probably was.  
"I'm no one important." Lena uttered softly, it was true she was a nobody.

"Not yet." Johnny replied it's almost as if knew more about Lena's future than she did and it was a little disorientating.

Lena sighed it was obvious he wasn't going to tell her anything and she shouldn't have expected him too, they carried on eating in silence until a ringing phone disrupted the comfortable silence.  
"Boss?" Lena showed very little interest in the phone call.  
"I'll be back in 10 minutes, just going to walk the girl back." Johnny hang up the phone before standing up quickly, Lena looked up at him before taking another sip of her tea.  
"You don't have to walk me back."  
"the cars still parked up outside your building so I might as well, come on shift your ass." Lena only nodded in reply as she pulled on her coat before standing. She called a short 'goodbye' to the lady behind the counter who only raised a hand in gesture as they both left the small bakery.

"Well least he's walking us back, that's nice of him."  
"Good thing we agreed to go with him, shouldn't have told him about it being our birthday though, he's probably pitying us right now."

"oh shut up all of you." Lena whispered to herself but not quite quietly enough as Johnny turned back to look her.

"I'm fine." Looking over at him as he simply nodded and carried on walking, she really probably should go see a doctor on account of the voices, but she wasn't about to admit to anyone that she was crazy. With a sigh Lena's mind wandered back to her brother and she wondered what it was that he was doing right now.

 _"_ _Take the kid to the park." Colonel Flag looked over at his children  
"You're not coming?" Rick made the mistake of questioning his father although he didn't expect the backhander he got across his left cheek especially not in front of Lena, the little girl stood there wide eyed as she pulled at her older brother's hand._

 _Once the pair had arrived at the small park in the next street over, Lena looked up to rick and asked him such an innocent question.  
"Does daddy hate us?" the five-year-old having not quite understood what happened.  
"No, he just expects us to behave, so when we go back home you have to be good and do as your told okay?" Rick told her as gently as he could despite being able to taste blood in his mouth.  
"I promise; I'll be good big brother." The younger girl smiled brightly as she ran off to go play with the other kids, the other parents at the playground always assumed that he was her father due to the fact he looked a lot older than he really was. He never stopped to correct them either._

Lena shook her head as she walked straight into Johnny it was almost like she had walked into a brick wall.  
"Get your head out of the clouds Eleanor and come back down to earth." He chided her as he turned round to look at her, it was at that moment that he realised just how fragile she was.  
"Sorry, you better go, I don't want your boss to get mad." Johnny laughed, it was like Lena already knew about the Joker's odd behaviour but he was also touched that she cared enough about him getting in trouble. Although he knew for a fact that he had seen four or five of his 'rivals' in his walk to find Lena.

Lena leant up and kissed him on the cheek before walking up the steps to her building, waving as she stepped through the door and headed up to her own apartment. Sighing heavily as she got into her own apartment, Lena found spending time with other people emotionally and physically draining.

End of Chapter Two

I apologise for not having this chapter up yesterday, so as I said in my other fic I will be uploading a chapter of each opposing Mondays, thank you all so much for reading, favouriting, following and reviewing I really do appreciate it.


	3. Chapter 3

As Always I do not i repeat i do NOT own the suicide squad i just own my little songbird Lena

Chapter Three

Today was finally the day, the day when Lena would sing in front of a strip club full of people, in front of some of Gotham's most important people gangsters and officials a like. Lena had gone out and brought an outfit she deemed suitable, a classic black dress that hit the floor pairing it with a simple pair of flats for some reason she felt uncomfortable in heels especially when she sang. A knock on the door distracted her from her primping. Peeping through the spy hole she saw blackness meaning someone had covered it, Lena opened the door faced with an unlikely face.

"Hello Eleanor." Lena took a step back not quite knowing whether to be shocked or scared.

"Daddy…What are you doing here?" The now much older man stood before Lena, a stern look written on his face.  
"This is enough, you've made your point now its time for you to come home back to Louisiana where you belong." Her father took a hold of her arm, digging his fingers in beginning to pull.  
"But, daddy this is my home now, I don't belong there any more."

"Your mother misses you," that's what he always did, he always tried to pull out the 'mother misses you' card.  
"Momma probably doesn't know that i'm even gone," as quick as it had left her lips a fist collided with her right cheek sending Lena flying into a cabinet hitting her head before crumpling to the ground. Her father stood above her pulling her from the floor, Lena letting out a squeal as he did so.  
"I'm not gonna go home with you Daddy…I can't." She pleaded desperately before further blows were landed to her fragile ribs.

Flashback

"You done get back here Eleanor." Rick Flag Senior shouted over the corn fields as he watched Lena run through the tall crops as they swayed as she ran through not stopping until she had reached the stream.

"This is it, we're going to make it, just a little further then he can't get us."  
"He'll catch us, he'll drag us back to the house, that's where we're going to die."

"Don't scare her, we're free just a little further look another half a mile till the bus stop."

"RUN RUN RUN RUN." Her father had caught up on her and was now within an arms reach of her reaching out to grab Lena's arm. He'd managed it, he'd caught her tugging her arm back violently she felt her shoulder pull out of the socket and she let out a shrill cry before falling to the floor.

End of flashback

Blackness soon filled her mind she was convinced that this was the end and she would never wake up again…this was her end.  
"We can't die…wake up."  
"Open your eyes Lena."  
"Come on Birdie, breathe."  
"Goddamit it we need to open our eyes."  
"I swear to god Birdie, I can't take you to the hospital the boss wouldn't like that."  
Lena's eyes fluttered open looking up at a certain Johnny Frost who was far to close to her, she needed to push him away but her arms didn't want to work.  
"What the hell happened?" Blinking she looked straight up at him.  
"I tripped." Lena's words small and shaky as Johnny shook his head clearly not believing her lie.

Johnny reached out and brushed his fingers first across her forehead and then her bruised cheek, he recoiled when she hissed.  
"Shit sorry."  
"It's okay." She whispered it's not like she wasn't used to the pain, it was just a surprise somebody else touching her, now that she wasn't used too. Without asking he swept her up off the floor and out of her apartment, lena's nosey neighbours had poked their heads out of their doors making her feel all the more self conscious.

"Want me to put you down?" Johnny asked her as softly as was possible for a guy his size, she buried her head into his chest.  
"I'll take that as a no then." Lena just nodded her head as the cold night air hit her skin shivering

"My bag it's on the door could you grab it please?" he nodded, looking down at her noticing how vulnerable she looked, grabbing her back from a hit on the back of the door. Johnny somehow managed to manoeuvre the younger woman into the car before getting into the drivers seat and pulling away from the curb.

"If there's time can we stop by a drug store?" Johnny looked over at her and noticed that she wouldn't look at him.

"Sure whatever you want Birdy." He stopped the car outside a small drug store, Lena darted out to grab what it was that she needed. She hadn't been gone more than five minutes before she threw open the car door and slipped inside again carrying a small bag. Once they were on the move again she began pulling out various make up products as well as a small mirror, first strategically placing foundation over her face to hide the fast showing bruising on both her cheek and forehead. The concealer was next dabbing it on for extra coverage, Johnny stole glances at her not liking the way she seemed to know exactly how to cover up the angry welts on her face so deftly and with little complaint just the odd sigh.

"You don't have to sing tonight ya know." Johnny's voice rougher than he'd wanted it to be but Lena didn't even flinch.  
"I promised, I would, plus I like singing." Lena's voice much softer than his, in his head he likened himself to a lion and Lena to a lamb.  
"Suit yourself." Lena nodded as she hummed quietly to the radio in the background as the car soon pulled up in front of the 'Grin and Bare It' strip club. Before stepping out the car and onto the cold street, Lena stowed the make up products in her small bag just as Johnny opened her door.  
"Thank you." She murmured before heading in through the doors of the club, the bouncers didn't question her as to who she was as they opened each of the double doors for her.

"This way, the boss' lady is waiting for ya." Johnny led the way through the club and out the back through a maze of corridors, knocking on a particular door he waited outside before the door was yanked off.  
"Watcha want Johnny Boy?" Johnny stepped aside leaving Lena with a view of a beautiful woman with white blonde hair with the tips died half blue and half red and wearing little more than a silk robe.  
"Songbird for ya." Johnny wanted to tell the infamous Harley Quinn to at least be a little bit gentle with his birdie but telling Harley Quinn what to do wouldn't have been a wise move on his part at least.  
"Harley Quinn, Nice to meet ya." The woman called Harley stuck out her hand and Lena took it cautiously before shaking it gently.

"Lena, nice to meet you as well."  
"She's adorable Johnny, where'd ya find her?" Harley circled the young woman looking her over, Lena was getting very annoyed at the fact that everyone kept referring to her as if she belonged to Johnny.  
"Singing on a corner, I gotta go talk to Mr J, think you can sort her out?" Johnny pushed Lena forward a little before turning to leave, Harley took hold of Lena's hand and pulled her gently into Harley's extravagant dressing room.

"Come on Birdy we gotta get you something to wear…black is so dreary." Harley seemed so happy to speak with another female it wasn't long before Harley was telling Lena all about her Puddin'. It was hard for Lena to believe all of what Harley told her about her Puddin' because she had met him and he didn't come a cross as the warm and fuzzy type.

"Birdy you decided what you're gonna sing yet?"  
"Oh…no, do you have any requests?" Lena had a few ideas as to what she could sing but no decision was set in stone, she watched as Harley pulled out her cell phone and began to play a song.

"This is mine and Mistah J's song, think you can sing it?"

'I need a gangsta, to love me better.'

Lena couldn't help but laugh just a little, the song was telling of the relationship between Harley Quinn and The Joker.

"You know he likes you right birdy?" Harley stood behind the younger woman as she brushed out the curls in Lena's hair, who couldn't help but laugh.

"It's true, even Puddin' has seen it, told me so himself." Harley giggled before moving on to applying heavier make up to Lena's face.

Harley immediately noticed the camouflaged bruises on Lena's face tilting her head to see the welts better.  
"Johnny…did he do this?" Harley seemed concerned and her eyes shone with just the smallest glint of anger.

"What? Oh no it wasn't."  
"You sure Birdy? I can kill him if he did." Harley seemed serious as she produced a long bat seemingly out of nowhere.

"Harley…no it wasn't Johnny."

"Good, i'll knock his block off if he hurt you." Lena was surprised by the words that come from her new found friend, she hadn't been used to anyone standing up for her in a very long time.

"Now we gotta find you something to wear…hmm oh I have just the thing." Harley pulled out a mid length black body con dress with a low cut V in the front it's almost as if she knew about Lena's scars that covered the majority of her back.

"Baby…beautiful as always…now what's this? A very pretty birdy? The infamous Joker had entered the room soundlessly.  
"Whatcha think puddin'?"

"Beautiful…but you know you're the only one for me" It was very obvious that the Joker only had eyes for Harley Quinn, a relationship that Lena found oddly inspiring.

"Come on Birdy." Johnny had appeared in the door way of the dressing room holding his large hand out for Lena to take which she did quickly to escape the intensity that had built up in the short time since the Joker had entered the room. Once away from the two psychopath lovers, Johnny pushed Lena up against the wall and kissed her, Lena was too stunned to fight him back, she instead found herself leaning into the unexpected kiss.  
"Sorry…I just had too." Johnny began making his excuses, it wasn't like him to act so reckless, Lena looked at the ground not sure what to say it's not like she had been kissed before.

"Birdy, come sing for us." A voice called out in the distance Harley stood in the hallway watching the exchange with a smirk, Johnny moved an arm leaving Lena enough room to slip past. She gave him a sheepish look over her shoulder as Harley pulled her away into a room full of her guests.  
"Johnny, my boy I think you got it bad for our little songbird." The Joker laughed before following behind the two women.

Lena was pushed out into the middle of the room, she was thankful that there was no stage, she took in a deep breathe and closed her eyes as the music began counting the beats in her head.

I need a gangsta

To love me better

Than all the others do

To always forgive me

Ride or die with me

That's just what gangsters do

I'm fucked up, I'm black and blue

I'm built for all the abuse

I got secrets that nobody, nobody, nobody knows

I'm good on that pussy shit

I don't want what I can get

I want someone with secrets that nobody, nobody, nobody knows

The song came to an end with a furious round of applause, the evening was an overall success with Harley inviting Lena back to sing for a couple of nights a week before handing her a cell phone with three numbers in her's, Johnny's and Mr J's. It was gone 4am when Lena finally left the club for the night, she'd had fun and it was one of the few times she had actually enjoyed herself. Lena couldn't help but notice that Johnny had disappeared apparently on an errand for his boss, so she would have to find her own way home, but she was a big girl she could manage.

Shoes in hand, Lena made several attempts to hail a cab but none were interested, she looked at the cellphone Harley had given her and fora split second she considered calling Johnny. But, he'd done enough for her maybe the walk home would at least sober her up a little, tonight had been the first time she had ever drank alcohol and it loosened her up enough to forget the voices in her head and to let loose and have fun.

The mile or so walk didn't seem so long, but it sure felt it by the time Lena got home she was more than exhausted and she was convinced that the bed was calling her name very loudly. Stripping off all of her clothes and peeled back the covers of her small bed and fell back into the soft mattress before pulling the blankets up and over her head.

End of Chapter Three

Thank you all for reading so far the song featured in the chapter in Gangsta - Kehlani it's in the scene where The Joker pulls Harley from the acid incase anybody wondered.


	4. Chapter 4

DISCLAIMER - AS ALWAYS I DO NOT OWN SUICIDE SQUAD

 **Chapter Four**

* * *

Lena sighed she was two weeks into singing at the club, it was an interesting dynamic especially considering a few of the dancers had taken to stripping while she sang. It wasn't a sign of disrespect more like she had the type of voice that could make people lose their clothes quickly.

Lena glanced over to the pile of money on her bed, she didn't know what to do with it. The joker refused to let her open a bank account to store her earnings, most likely because he would have robbed the bank within a week of it being there. Harley suggested she got herself a bigger apartment but Lena wasn't one for extravagant things, plus she wouldn't know where to start looking for that sort of thing.

A shrill ringing erupts from the device placed next to the pile of money, sighing Lena brought it up to her ear.  
"Doll face, I need someone to come shopping with me, you'll come?" Harley's blud haven accent filled the speaker.  
"I...I suppose so yes." Lena was still afraid to show her true self to Harley, afraid that she would be rejected by yet another person.  
"Goodie, I'll meet you outside in 5." Harley giggled before hanging up the phone.

Harley had already been on Her way when she called Lena knowing that the young woman wouldn't say no to her. Lena was positive that Harley wouldn't have taken 'no' as the answer anyway. Slipping on some flat nude pumps onto her feet as she hurriedly tries to do something with the bird's nest on top of her head. Lena was hopeless at girly things hair, makeup and picking what looked good on her wasn't her forte. So, Harley offering to take her shopping was a godsend, she took a brief look in the mirror...plain that's what she saw and that's what others saw.

"Losing too much weight again."  
"Nonsense these clothes are just too big"  
"Harley isn't any good as a friend, that girl's a nut."  
"So...why haven't we called Johnny yet?"  
"Busy killing people probably that's what he does, some of the girls at the club said so."  
Lena took a deep breath as the voices shouted amongst each other all vying for her attention.  
"Please stop...just for a little while." She pleaded with the voices knowing they weren't just about to stop no matter how nice she asked them.

* * *

 **Flashback**

'Dear big brother,

I got my swimming badge today, see look. I'm being good like you said, daddy gives me a little pocket money every month now. I'm saving for singing lessons, I can't afford them right now but soon.

I miss you,  
Lena'

Dear big brother

A boy asked me out today, I said no, I don't think daddy would like that too much. The kids at school they've been making fun or my clothes again, but I just let them I don't mind.

I miss you,  
Lena

Dear big brother

It's my birthday today, no one remembered, daddy said you don't come home because of me. Ricky come home soon okay?

I miss you,  
Lena

Dear big brother

It's your birthday today, happy birthday. I don't think I will write many more times, you don't reply, I'm starting to think your dead.

Lena

Dear big brother,

This will be the last letter that I write to you. You left me with these people, they beat me and are unkind. But I'm always good, I promise yet I can never seem to do anything right, I fear he'll kill me soon.

Lena

* * *

 **End of flashback**

"Hahahahahahah, she thinks we'll stop. The other voices carried on laughing too, they were cruel and many times the voices didn't care. Lena banged her head hard against the wall hoping to disturb the voices, she repeated the action several times until she was satisfied. A knock on the door disturbed her, she checked in the small mirror on the back of the door for any blood. Satisfied she pulled open the door to see something she wasn't expecting.

"Johnny?" Lena exclaimed quietly.  
"Did you trip?" His left hand reaching out brushing the bump on her forehead, she hissed slightly.  
"Always so clumsy," Johnny whispered as he stood awkwardly in the doorway.  
"Mr. J is back from his trip early so Harley told me to take you shopping." Lena looked up at him with her big blue doe eyes.  
"Oh, that's nice but I think I'll just stay here instead, sorry you had a wasted journey."  
"There's a gallery over the other side of Gotham, do you wanna go with me?" Lena only nodded in response.  
"A Better idea than shopping. Can't understand how women shop so much."  
"I don't."  
"You're something else Birdie." She looked up at him not sure whether it was meant as a compliment or an insult.

* * *

 **Flashback**

"This is Lena...she's a little different." A seven-year-old Lena stood next to the dance teacher, by using the word 'different' the teacher had automatically subjected Lena to name calling and bullying.  
"How was your class?" Her father sat in the driver's seat , ignoring the little girl's tears and disheveled hair.  
"Fine daddy...thank you for taking me." Her line was rehearsed like everything she did.  
"Good." The man looked over at her disgust clearly evident, leaving Lena to smile weakly before it was slapped from her face to be replaced by a blank look.

Their ride home was silent, the atmosphere in the car palpable. The little girl kept her gaze directed out the passenger window as she tears rolled down her small cheeks. They were nearly home when Lena made the mistake of opening her mouth.  
"Daddy...can we go get ice cream next week...for my birthday?" It was an innocent enough question but Lena noticed the bubbling rage coming from her father.  
"I just paid out $400 for your damn dancing and you want fucking ice cream too?" Rick senior slammed the brakes of the car on stopping on a quiet country back road.

"Daddy I'm sorry, I promise...I promise I'll be good...I'm sorry for asking, I won't ask again." The little girl tried to back peddle quickly knowing nothing can undo what had just happened. She watched as her father flung the driver's door open and marched round to her own piling it open violently.

Her father began pulling at her little body, Lena squealed out in pain as the seat belt dug into her skin.  
"Daddy stop I promise I'll be good...I promise I'll be good." The little girl repeated several times until it appeared the older man had calmed down.  
"Get out the damn car, you can walk home." Her father still seething as the little girl unbuckled her seat belt quickly hoping from the car pulling her small bag with her.  
"Now start walking it's 6 miles home if you're smart you won't come back." The older man spat out as he got in the car and pulled away at speed leaving only dust in his wake.

* * *

 **End of flashback**

"Birdie...birdie? You there?" Johnny looked at the young women clearly worried by her lack of coherency.  
"I promise I'll be good," Lena whispered softly as her dazed eyes began to see again, she noticed the way Johnny looked at her and simply smiled.  
"You okay their birdie?" Lena nodded as she walked past her and out of her apartment.  
The moment she had just relieved had been one of the worst, she had gotten lost on the way back, she had been found by a farmer curled up in a corn field and was taken back home. Lena at the time wished that the farmer's dog hadn't found her and that she had died.

The drive to the gallery was longer due to the insane amount of traffic surround the center of Gotham, being in the car was making Lena antsy the skin on her hands suffering as she picked at them. A large hand soon covered both of hers, it was as a pacifier and it worked. It wasn't long before Lena began to trace the scars on Johnny's hand gently as if the wounds were still there.  
"Fucking traffic," Johnny muttered under his breath as his free hand drummed the steering wheel impatiently.  
"What's this one from?" Lena ran an index finger over a nearly perfect circle on his hand.  
"My wife shot me." He says it so casually that Lena nearly dismisses his answer,

"You're married?" Lena didn't seem surprised in fact she felt a little heartbroken, she was silly to think he was interested in a little girl like her it made her feel foolish.  
"Yeah, got a kid too." Johnny smiled at the thought, oblivious to the fact he'd been pulling Lena along. It was clear to Lena now, the joker had been their mastermind behind the plan in order to get what he wanted from Lena he would need to string her along but he couldn't do that so he got his right-hand man to do it for him.  
Lena was a pawn in the Joker's already elaborate game, the kiss, the way Johnny had acted it had all been fake. This was the reason the young woman trusted no one they all lied to her all of them to exploit her and get what they wanted from her. Suddenly her heart felt like it was going to burst through her chest, Her breathing became irrational and her vision blurred.

"Birdie... hey birdie look at me...damn it birdie look at me." Johnny's rough voice penetrated her panic stricken mind but still not enough to pull her out. The slap echoed throughout the car leaving a ringing in Lena's ear. It was enough to bring her back, A hand went to cup her now red cheek.  
"Birdie I'm sorry I had to do that, you made me do it." Johnny seemed to be the one panicking now especially when the tears came he felt awkward not knowing what to do.  
"It's okay." Her voice barely more than a whisper.  
"Fuck, why is there so much damn traffic." Johnny's had slammed down on the steering wheel causing Lena to jump in her seat.

Lena tested the handle of the door noticing it wouldn't budge, the child lock must have been on. The traffic finally began to free up a little and the voices had finally calmed and quietened down enough for Lena to string a coherent thought together.  
"Do you see your kid a lot?"  
"Don't really get time with a job like this,she's a good girl, though, takes after her mother."  
"You should see her more." She hadn't met her own father until she was three years old and she wished never knew that she existed.

"We don't have to talk about this Birdie." Johnny knew that him having a wife and a kid affected his chances with Lena.  
"No, it's okay." A small smile graced Lena's face as she watched him squirm, in a way she enjoyed it.  
"So does your wife know you like to kiss other women?" Lena looked up at him through her long eyelashes.  
"We see other people." His voice blunt and straight the point, Lena giggled having gotten the response she wanted.  
"You're tryin' to push me aren't you?" Johnny glanced over at her before diverting his gaze back to the moving traffic "I don't know what you mean." Lena resided herself to silence for the rest of their journey which turned out to only be another ten minutes, closing her eyes, Lena leaned back into the seat.

"Makin' a habit of sleeping in my car?" Johnny spoke softly placing a gentle hand on one of her arms thinking she was sleep. "What can I say your cars kinda comfy, I wasn't sleeping though thinking about the meaning of life?  
"Find a good enough answer?"  
"42" Johnny just looked at Lena as if she was just plain crazy.  
"You've never read The Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy have you?" a small smile played on Lena's lips as she spoke looking over at Johnny, it was then that Johnny knew he was in too deep. Too deep to turn and run away from how he felt.  
"I don't read much," Johnny admitted he was almost embarrassed.  
"I guessed, so are we going in?"

The gallery was dead silent except it wasn't quite so eerie, Lena had yet to notice that she and Johnny were the only two in the gallery. Lena stood in front of each painting for a good 5 minutes admiring the work that went into each. She had a way of being able to put herself into the artist's shoes as they painted and being able to draw the emotions that had gone into each of the paintings.

Arms slipped around Lena's waist as she sighed heavily leaning back into Johnny's chest.  
"Don't understand why you like all these old paintings birdie, you need to live in the here and now." Johnny wanted to bring Lena into the present and not have her living in the past.  
"Maybe you're right," Lena whispered softly as Johnny kissed the top of her head.  
"I know what's best for you birdie."

* * *

 **Flashback**

"I know what's best for you Eleanor, those other people don't, I'm your father and you will do as I say, do you understand?" Rick Flag Senior shook the eleven-year-old girl violently as her mother sat in front of the muted television. The young girl nodded her head profusely as she was being shaken, the grip her father had on her arms was like similar to that of a vice used for metal work. She would definitely be wearing a long sleeved shirt to school tomorrow despite the extreme heatwave that they were having in Louisiana that year.

School had been terrible for Lena that day, the heat was sweltering and the long sleeved t-shirt she had worn to cover the numerous bruises up and down her arms hadn't made the heat any easier to cope with.  
"Eleanor?"  
"Yes, Miss?" Eleanor looked over at her history teacher Miss Clark, preparing herself to be ready to answer a question on the topic they were currently studying.  
"Aren't you a little hot in those long sleeves?" The newly qualified teacher meant well but it wouldn't be good for her to poke her nose into others business. Lena merely bobbed her head up and down to indicate that she was fine.

"You little brat, what did you say at that damn school of yours?" As soon as Lena walked through the door of her 'home.  
"Nothing daddy, I promise," "then why did I have a Miss Clark on the phone asking me to come in and see her, you told her something didn't you?"  
"No, sir…I promise I didn't tell her nothing" "You tell her anything Eleanor and I will kill you and that's a promise." Flag Senior let go of Lena watching as she turned and scurried up the stairs.

 **End of Flashback**

* * *

Lena came back to the real world with a crash, the flashbacks always left her confused and with each of the voices in her head talking a mile a minute.  
"Deep breaths Birdie." Lena looked up at Johnny, her breathing uneven, before it finally settled right back down to a pace considered normal. "Let's go, I'm starving." Johnny pulled her arms from her waist as he walked towards the exit.  
"Wait…where is everyone?" Lena asked curiously in hearing his answer.  
"Hired out the whole place for us," Johnny spoke casually not noticing the gobsmacked look on Lena's face.  
"You shouldn't have done that, it's expensive, Johnny I'm not wo…" Before Lena could finish her sentence, Johnny kissed her.  
"If you weren't worth it Birdie you'll still be singing on that street corner."

 **End of Chapter**

Thank you all for all reading this far I really do appreciate it also I am on the lookout for a beta if anyone would be interested please do private message me


	5. Chapter 5

Hello Everyone

It's recently come to my attention that someone has plagiarized one of my fanfic's 'I Promise, I'll Be Good' essentially only changing names, after contacting they basically said they won't do anything to remove the plagiarized material so because of this, I've decided to say farewell to fanfiction for awhile. it's a real shame because I've been apart of this site for such a long time and I've met some really lovely people, it's just disheartening to have your own work taken and posted as someone else's. I may come back to writing one day but for right now I'm taking a break.

I feel like I've disappointed you all and I'm sorry but I hope you all understand and forgive me,  
Delinquent Dog


	6. Long Awaited Update

I've put off putting this out for a good long while, but I'm afraid my heart isn't in finishing either I promise, I'll be good or gods and monsters. It's very emotionally draining to write such dark plot lines, and I'm in a better place in my life than when I first started writing both stories. I hope you'll forgive me and stick with me for other stories I write in the future

Love Always,

Delinquent Dog


End file.
